The Words of a Big Brother
by only-some-loser
Summary: Pretending to be Murdoc wasn't something that Mac could just shake off, despite how much he wanted to. The psychopath had said things that were haunting Mac's mind, but Jack is always there to chase the ghosts away. (tag to 1x20, Hole Puncher)


**AN: This is the twentieth installment of my personal challenge to write a tag for every episode. This is a tag to 1x20, Hole Puncher. It picks up right where the episode ends. I hope you enjoy, and please leave a review!**

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Mac visibly shuddered the moment the door to the interrogation room was closed, shakily running his hands through his hair. To say the kid looked rattled would have been an understatement. But possibly even worse, he looked concerned, worried even. It was over, so why did Mac still look so nervous? Was it just Murdoc in general?

"Hey man, you okay? Murdoc didn't touch you did he?" Jack asked. He was pretty sure his spidey-senses would have been tingling more if the psychopath had put his hands on Mac, but he needed to ask, just to be sure.

"Yeah, I'm..." he trailed off, letting out a shaky breath. "I'm fine," he insisted, quickly putting a very fake smile on his face. Jack saw right through it.

"Like hell you are. Come on bud, what's wrong?" he asked again. Most people would tell him to mind his own business, but Mac was his partner, his best friend, his little brother in all ways that mattered. Things that were impacting the kid this much _were_ Jack's business.

"This is really not the time or place where I wanna talk about it," Mac muttered in reply, walking past Jack and towards the front of the prison. Jack didn't mind the wait. They had driven together in Jack's car, meaning that Jack then had complete control of where they would go, and hopefully, what they would talk about. The kid's mental health had never been perfect, but Jack could tell that there was something truly grating on that genius brain of his, and Jack would do anything in the world to help make it right.

"Alright," he begrudgingly replied. "But this isn't over." No, Jack would get to the bottom of this. He hadn't spent years gaining Mac's trust and breaking down his walls for nothing.

Five minutes later, the two were in Jack's car and driving away. Mac probably thought they were driving to his house, where Jack would then drop him off, but he would be wrong. Seeing the kid this concerned meant that he was going to Jack's apartment whether he liked it or not, at least for the remainder of the evening. Jack would drive him home later if he really wanted, but Jack assumed Mac would likely just decide to crash in the guest room like he often did after missions that were just a little too intense.

Jack glanced toward the kid in question. He was resting his elbow by the window with his head on his knuckles, staring out the window. He looked every bit the angsty teen he was acting like. The thought made Jack smile, remembering the kid he first met, who was in fact an angsty nineteen year old - for good reason, but still.

"Alright, kid, spit it out. What's botherin' your genius brain?" he asked, trying to keep his tone light. He figured it would take a couple of tries before he actually got Mac to give him a real answer.

"It's just been a stressful few days. I'm fine," Mac muttered in reply, not even glancing in Jack's direction. "Where are we going? I need to get back before Bozer starts worrying again," he continued in an attempt to change the topic.

"No, Bozer won't be worried. I sent him a text on the way out to let him know that you'd likely be crashin' at my place for the night. He's cool with it. But that's not the issue. The issue is you not being upfront about what's goin' on." Jack kept his tone neutral. He didn't want Mac getting all defensive and putting his walls back up.

"It's nothing, Jack," he replied as they drove into the parking lot of Jack's apartment complex. Jack pulled into a spot and turned the car off. "It's nothing you need to be worried about," Mac muttered as he opened the door and started walking towards the building. Jack sighed, rolling his eyes, but got out of the car and followed. That kid just didn't get it.

"It's _you_ , Mac, I always worry about you," he said, jogging to catch up to the blond. It was his job to worry about it. That was part of the whole protection detail thing, and it was a job he took very seriously.

"Well, then there's no need for you to be worrying even more," Mac replied with a sarcastic smile, pulling out his keys and finding the one to Jack's apartment as the two walked up the stairs. He'd had the key from the day that Jack moved in.

"Dude, this is serious." Mac ignored him and opened the door. He took off his jacket and set it on the counter. "Hey, _hey_ , Mac, come on," Jack said, catching Mac's shoulder and forcing the kid to look at him. "Now this is clearly buggin' you a lot, so you're gonna tell me what it is, and maybe see if I can help. That's kind of what I'm here for pal." Mac sighed and turned away, running his hands through his hair again, his main tell that he was stressed beyond belief.

"It's just that it was too easy, okay? It was way too easy to pretend to be a bloodthirsty psychopath who kills people for the fun of it," he said, his voice thick with emotion. Jack held eye contact with him, but didn't say anything. He knew the kid wasn't done yet. "And maybe that scares me a little, alright? I mean..." he sighed, looking away from Jack and crossing his arms as if he were cold. "Murdoc said that we aren't that different, and maybe he's right," Mac finished in a whisper.

"That bastard is just playin' mind games with you, that's what he loves," Jack started. He couldn't believe he had to have this conversation with Mac, a conversation about how truly different the kid was to a complete psychopath. That should have been obvious, but apparently not. "Mac, you are a hero, okay? You save lives every day and the world doesn't even know it. That psycho kills people, because it's fun. There is nothing similar about you two, nothing!"

"But what if Murdoc's right?!" he shouted, a stark contrast to his earlier whisper. "What if I'm not as good as I think I am? What if- what if deep down inside, I'm as dark as he is?" Mac asked, his voice cracking at the end. He turned away from Jack again and took a deep, shuddering breath.

"Mac," Jack said, his gentle tone matching his gentle touch as he placed his hand on Mac's shoulder, getting him to make eye contact again. "You are the most good at heart person I've ever met, okay? You have such compassion for other people, even for criminals, and no one I know can rival that. Murdoc doesn't have that at all. You're so pure at heart, and kind, and trusting, even though that gets you into trouble sometimes. No one cares as much as you do, least of all Murdoc. The fact that you're even stressin' about this so much proves how different the two of you really are. So no, Mac, you're not the same. You're not even remotely similar to each other, and there is nothing you could ever do that would make me believe that you are. I will never believe that you, the real you, is anything but truly _good_." Jack let his eyes show the emotion he was feeling. He needed Mac to understand this, he needed him to know how amazing he was. The kid was the little brother Jack had always wanted, and big brothers were always there for their little brothers, always. So of course Jack needed Mac to understand this. He squeezed the blond's shoulder to add a little emphasis when Mac didn't respond. Finally, the kid nodded a few times, albeit shakily.

"Okay, maybe you're right," he muttered, but Jack considered it a win. "Maybe it is just more of his mind games. He does seem to love those." Mac took another glance at Jack and gave him the barest hint of a smile. It was a very small one, but it was a real one, and that's all that mattered to Jack.

"You're damn right I'm right. Now come on, let's order in and watch a Bruce Willis movie. I'll even let you pick which one," Jack replied with his signature grin, patting Mac on the back and walking back towards the kitchen.

Mac couldn't see it, but on the inside, Jack was seething. Murdoc was continually messing with his kid, even from behind bars, and that wasn't okay with him. He knew there really was nothing he could do about the psychopath, but he could always do something for Mac. Whether it was be there with a heartfelt conversation, a good Bruce Willis movie, or even just a warm hug, Jack would always do anything and everything in his power to help that kid. Mac meant everything to him, and the words of a psychopath with a strange, lusty obsession with Mac would always mean nothing next to the words of a big brother.


End file.
